Were Quotes - 9quotes.com

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If life were fair, Dan Quayle would be making a living asking 'Do you want fries with that?'
Written by John Cleese
The one function that TV news performs very well is that when there is no news we give it to you with the same emphasis as if it were.
Written by David Brinkley
Things are more like they are now than they ever were before.
Written by Dwight D. Eisenhower
If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners.
Written by Johnny Carson
I believe in rules. Sure I do. If there weren't any rules, how could you break them?
Written by Leo Durocher
There was a time when a fool and his money were soon parted, but now it happens to everybody.
Written by Adlai E. Stevenson
We were the Spice Boys.
Written by George Harrison
I bought some batteries, but they weren't included.
Written by Steven Wright
Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore.
Written by Ogden Nash
You can figure out who you were by which movies you loved when.
Written by Mary Schmich
If I weren't earning $3 million a year to dunk a basketball, most people on the street would run in the other direction if they saw me coming.
Written by Charles Barkley
I had pro offers from the Detroit Lions and Green Bay Packers, who were pretty hard up for linemen in those days. If I had gone into professional football the name Jerry Ford might have been a household word today.
Written by Gerald R. Ford
The best minds are not in government. If any were, business would steal them away.
Written by Ronald Reagan
Look at everything as though you were seeing it for the first time or the last time. Then your time on earth will be filled with glory.
Written by Betty Smith
By the end, everybody had a label - pig, liberal, radical, revolutionary... If you had everything but a gun, you were a radical but not a revolutionary.
Written by Jerry Rubin
If writers were good businessmen, they'd have too much sense to be writers.
Written by Irvin S. Cobb
The most important things to say are those which often I did not think necessary for me to say - because they were too obvious.
Written by Andre Gide
If you can remember anything about the sixties, you weren't really there.
Written by Paul Kantner
If all mankind minus one were of one opinion, mankind would be no more justified in silencing that one person than he, if he had the power, would be justified in silencing mankind.
Written by John Stuart Mill
Were it left to me to decide whether we should have a government without newspapers, or newspapers without a government, I should not hesitate a moment to prefer the latter.
Written by Thomas Jefferson
When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.
Written by Norm Crosby
The penalty for laughing in a courtroom is six months in jail; if it were not for this penalty, the jury would never hear the evidence.
Written by H. L. Mencken
It is hard to believe that a man is telling the truth when you know that you would lie if you were in his place.
Written by H. L. Mencken
If an army of monkeys were strumming on typewriters, they might write all the books in the British Museum.
Written by Arthur Eddington
Would that I were a dry well, and that the people tossed stones into me, for that would be easier than to be a spring of flowing water that the thirsty pass by, and from which they avoid drinking.
Written by Khalil Gibran
When we got into office, the thing that surprised me most was to find that things were just as bad as we'd been saying they were.
Written by John F. Kennedy
My movies were the kind they show in prisons and airplanes, because nobody can leave.
Written by Burt Reynolds
If Roosevelt were alive today, he'd turn over in his grave.
Written by Samuel Goldwyn
And so by the fifteenth century, on October 8, the Europeans were looking for a new place to try to get to, and they came up with a new concept: the West.
Written by Dave Barry
Personally, I would be delighted if there were a life after death, especially if it permitted me to continue to learn about this world and others, if it gave me a chance to discover how history turns out.
Written by Carl Sagan

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