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I am always so happy to be at 'SNL.' I still feel like a kid when I'm there, like I can't believe I'm watching them make the show.
Written by
Nick Offerman
I've learned through experience that to trouble celebrities with my handshake doesn't do anybody any good.
Written by
Nick Offerman
I grew up among farmers in Illinois and so you always have to have the tools you might need in the eventuality of a flat tire or a broken window.
Written by
Nick Offerman
For years I drove a big Ford F250 pickup. That was my ride because two-thirds of my work was wood work, and I'm always driving up to Northern California, where I harvest salvaged trees.
Written by
Nick Offerman
I think it's fascinating that I receive attention for what people perceive to be a level of manliness or machismo, when amongst my family of farmers and paramedics and regular Americans, I'm kind of the sissy in my family.
Written by
Nick Offerman
I'm enjoying the opportunity that 'Parks And Recreation' affords me to exploit my own soapbox agenda, which is to try to encourage people to make things with their hands.
Written by
Nick Offerman
I've had to learn and discipline myself that I'm much happier and much less depressed if I give myself a project. It's just that simple.
Written by
Nick Offerman
When I hear young people today complain about being bored - and the things that keep them from being bored are generally exclusively videogames and/or computer pastimes - I just try to encourage them to go outside.
Written by
Nick Offerman
I would like Americans to make things with their hands. Thomas Jefferson and I feel that makes for a much stronger nation.
Written by
Nick Offerman
Meat is a big deal in my life. I do love breakfast food, but I don't think that's extraordinary. I'm a normal American. We love eggs and meat and potatoes and gravy.
Written by
Nick Offerman
I come from a family of fishermen. Fishing is very important to us. We don't hunt. We're not gun folk.
Written by
Nick Offerman
I am a saxophone player.
Written by
Nick Offerman
I also grew up building theatrical scenery. I spent many years building scenery as a large part of my income and that allowed me to really develop my shop skills.
Written by
Nick Offerman
When I got to Los Angeles, I started building cabins in peoples' yards, building post-and-beam structures and cutting the joinery for those.
Written by
Nick Offerman
It's funny, growing up there was never anybody around me with any kind of artistic bent.
Written by
Nick Offerman
When I was in high school, I would perform every year in those plays and there was something I really loved about it. But I was completely unaware that you could sort of get into an acting career.
Written by
Nick Offerman
My uncles, who are farmers in Minooka, Illinois - I grew up with them and their pickup trucks and mustaches, and to me that was masculinity: big hairy sweaty guys who could pick up a bus.
Written by
Nick Offerman
I'm very hairy, and men in film and TV are no longer allowed to be hairy.
Written by
Nick Offerman
If properly dried and trimmed, New York-style pizza could be used to make a box for Chicago-style pizza.
Written by
Nick Offerman
I have a corn creamer that I love. It extracts pulp and juice from kernels, and I simmer that down into a creamed corn that has an almost mashed potato-like consistency. I add butter and hit it with chopped fresh chives at the end for an accent of color.
Written by
Nick Offerman
I've been working steadily as an actor since around 1998. I wasn't well known in the public, but I was a dependable working journeyman.
Written by
Nick Offerman
If you're an original thinker, you are going get told 'no' a lot, and you have to be able to hear 'no' many times from the bankers and trust that at some point, someone is going to recognize that you are an artist and not a can of soda.
Written by
Nick Offerman
My wife happens to be probably the greatest working woman in comedy. I can't think of anyone who even approaches her achievements and her abilities.
Written by
Nick Offerman
When I got my job on 'Parks,' it was so dreamy, kind of unfathomable. I didn't think a job that excellent could exist for me.
Written by
Nick Offerman
I've never seen a theater community to rival that of Chicago. Neither New York nor L.A. has the raw talent or integrity that Chicago theater has, and I think it's because Chicago doesn't have Broadway or the film and TV business to distract it.
Written by
Nick Offerman
If I had more time, I'd watch more woodworking or home-improvement shows, but, not enough hours in the day.
Written by
Nick Offerman
There have been a few occurrences where people in restaurants have sent me a rasher of bacon, which I am not going to turn my nose up at. I never let them down.
Written by
Nick Offerman
I have a wonderfully hedonistic appetite, and if I wasn't really strict with myself, I'd weigh 300 pounds. I'm not good with moderation.
Written by
Nick Offerman
We have such an embarrassment of riches when it comes to choice. Do you want to hike in the Alps? There are 300 pairs of shoes you can order within the next 10 minutes. You have your choice of everything.
Written by
Nick Offerman
I have a Kenwood charcoal grill. In our house, if anybody is cooking, it's me. I love making burgers. I love making pork tenderloin. Lamb chops I do on the grill a lot. But you just can't beat brats.
Written by
Nick Offerman
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